Among cloudy skies,
Strong winds bend trees as they blow.
A cold night without a soul in sight,
As I walk without an umbrella,

Then rain pours down.
At first, a drizzle,
Next, a downpour,
And all that matters is...

A single soul under the pouring rain,
Wet with thoughts of you.

by Marivic Defensor

I have had a lot of rain and umbrella references coming to me lately and all I could think of was something my mother always told me about Faith:

Prayer is: asking God to make it rain~
Faith is: Carrying an umbrella!

Guess God is reminding me to keep the faith~

That same day that I went out with my brother and met the EMO mess, I also ran into a guy I didn't date in high school named JR. JR is such a kind soul who is always smiling even when he's telling you something very serious. He's one of those people who have a permanent smile on there faces.

He use to cheat off of me in school, especially Geography, which is my worst subject. We were just talking when some random guy came up to us and said to JR, 'my your woman here looks just like Paula Abdul'...[ugh, I hate when people say that because I don't think I do]... JR says, 'she ain't my woman, she helped me get through high school' then he says to my surprise, 'she had a 72 buick skylark in school, [that was in 86/87] in mint condition, he says.

I was floored this person remember what car I drove~ He had a greater appreciation for that car, much more than I ever did. I didn't realize it was in mint condition because all I could see was the kinda 'minty' color it was on the outside~~~more like ~~Split Pea Soup-Green!!!

All these years I had no idea about the 'gem' I was driving!! I couldn't even tell you if the engine was 'clean' or not, all I saw when I got that car from MY DAD, was the outside--trying to convince myself that 'at least I had a car' and if they made fun of me at school, I would just tell them, at least its mine and not my mommy's or daddy's car... I was the only person in school who had her OWN car.

I learned 2 things from talking to JR that night:
1. It's the inside that counts, not the outside [well I knew that, just re-inforced a bit]

2. Each soul here on earth looks at everthing and everyone differently than the other...

that's what makes life so interesting~

Maybe God is trying to get me to look at my dad in a different way...Lord know's my dad can use the help!

I went and met my brother out last night.
I didn't expect to see an old boyfriend from elementary school (if you can call it that). My daughter is in the same grade I went out with him in..Yikes!

Apparently he remembers it better than I do.

So anyways, now this is the funny part...

We started talking and he says to me, 'you are still very beautiful', and I say my politically correct comment 'Thank you'! Then there was a 'long pause', but as a Seinfeld reference would make it, a 'long awkward pause', and he then says:

"Well aren't you going to say the same to me?"

I was like..

In my world, the qualifications for a question/response like that are:
1. you have to be a girl/chick
2. you have to be married or in a relationship for at least 10 years before a response like this is acceptable

I can't come up with anymore resonable qualifications...

So, I guess because I'm nice - or because I've known him a long time, I play into his insecurity and say: "Yeah, you look good too!"

Now here comes the finale:

Then he says, "Oh you don't mean it!"

At this time, I guess I don't mean it, because even if he did look good, now he is looking so pathetic I can't even believe I'm in this conversation and I'm looking for an appropriate 'exit stage left' PLEASE!!! Someone get me out of this conversation...

This is why I'm single and don't date...

Love and Light to all and to all a goodnight!

PS:
I apologize to the world and everyone in it if I've ever responded in such a way. All I know is I may have thought it, but I certainly didn't say it, and for now on, I'll never think it again!!

How wonderful it is to hold him

Pretending that we're lovers

Tangled in a prolonged embrace,

Enjoying the delicate sensations of

His soft then passionate kisses

The course of our lives,

Lived within one waking instance it seemed

A fantasy doomed at conception.

And I?  a hopless old romantic,

Misaligned by common sense

and complications,

Die a thousand deaths

Every time he walks away.

Sometimes we are up to bat, bases are loaded and the whole team is depending on you to get a hit. The only way you can get a hit, is if you swing the bat...you can't be afraid to swing. If you swing and you strike out, who cares, you tried~ But if you just stand there and don't swing, you won't know what you could have done!

You might even hit it out of the park if you try hard enough~

Bases are loaded, there are 2 outs, are you going to swing or just watch the ball go by?

I don't know about you, but I'm swinging!